R&D on R&D (Relationships & Disappointments) – A guest post
Here I am writing a post for Dev. It is an honour I must say, writing the 100th post. Thanks Dev. I am clueless as to what I’m going to write and I’m sure most of you following the blog would find it monotonous and wonder where he is? But please bear with me, because if I don’t write this, I might disappoint my dearest childhood buddy.
Talking of relationships and disappointments attached to them, most of us feel sad and demented when one of the closest person to us leaves us or drifts away. There is nothing wrong with it and rather, it is quite an obvious feeling. But it’s my feeling that every relationship teaches us something. Something good. No matter how badly it ended. Everyone comes in our life for a reason. They are there with us when we need them the most in our life.
Maybe to share our feelings because we were lonely, to cheer us up or boost up our spirits when we did not believe in ourselves and to lend us a shoulder when we were down and needed a friend. But the mistake we make is that, we want to hold them for life. This is the point when things start to deteriorate. This is indeed the point, when relationships move from ‘not-expecting-anything-in-return’ state to the ones where both sides of the relationships sound like, ‘I-expect-something-from-you’.
People come and go but what remains are the memories that will last with us forever. It’s my personal belief that there is no point in regretting anything in life. It’s always good to listen to everyone, but when the time comes to take the decision, its best to take your own decisions and if something goes wrong then we shall have only ourselves to blame, instead of those who were ‘supposedly’ expected to be influential in our decision making.
Shifting the focus to the darker and troubled side of relationships – read broken ones, we should look back and smile. Yes. We should smile. It’s because that was the best time, we could have spent with that person at that point in our life. With every bad relationship that ended on a sour note, we should be observant enough to recognise the hidden lesson for the future. And once we are able to understand that, we can be sure that we are not all that vulnerable as we used to be. We can judge people by their behaviour and decide whom to associate with and whom to stay away from. And one of the biggest realisations, that comes out from evolving with the relationships is that, we realise that we should not care for what people say about us. It’s because I believe in living life for myself and for people close to me and not for the society that “supposedly” I should be serving.
Experiences when passed through prisms of life manifest themselves in various human emotions, which are essential to make our personal rainbows colourful and I feel that I am blessed, that God has provided me diverse situations, which have enriched my life. Now I have the power as well as wisdom to appreciate life with all its pitfalls.